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Twitter launches convenient ‘death threat’ button

Another innovation inspired by Katie Hopkins. Twitter has announced a new button for its suite of apps, that makes it easier for people to troll celebrities and the vulnerable. The ‘death threat’...

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40 minute Facebook outage leaves society on brink of total collapse

Scenes during the FB outage would have made a great selfie A Facebook outage that lasted for forty minutes on Monday night left civilisation on the verge of a complete breakdown. Shops were looted in...

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Is this Britain’s new biggest killer?

One of these will blow your mind… The rapid increase in the number of click bait related deaths has led top neurologist Dr William Fish to call for immediate action to curb the practice. He blames the...

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Earth is 2 dimensional, insists one dimensional pop star.

B.o.B contemplating serious things. Hippety hoppity rap singer and renowned expert in cartography and basic astrophysics, B.o.B has amused and amazed his fans on social media recently by declaring his...

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Kanye West deadly serious

He’s not joking Rap star Kanye West actually believes the things he says and is not on a massive wind up, according to sources close to the bell-end. The part-time Hip Hop artist, part-time fashion...

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Twitter quits Stephen Fry

“Where’s it gone?” Following recent controversies, tech giant Twitter has announced it is leaving Stephen Fry with immediate effect. This is not the first time that Twitter has left Fry, but media...

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‘Mealy mouthed’ Brussels tweet guy to be beheaded

Matthew Doyle (artist’s impression) The government and Buckingham Palace have announced that in what is believed to be an historical first, capital punishment will be reinstated for a single day,...

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Some celebrity relationship bullshit going on with Taylor Swift

Dating Taylor Swift? We’re not really sure There is some kind of celebrity relationship bullshit happening, involving Taylor Swift and a man, or possibly two men, who are also celebrities, and...

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Trump takes credit for sun coming up this morning

Night, or hat too big, Donald? After taking credit for a new car factory which had been planned for years, Donald Trump has also insisted that a strongly-worded midnight tweet complaining about the...

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Nixon’s ghost distances itself from Donald Trump

Ghosts hate twitter #FACT The ghost of Richard Nixon held a press conference last night to make it clear that it has nothing whatsoever in common with Donald Trump. “I was a crook but this guy’s a...

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